A Right Brain Mind in a Left Brain World Page 4

  So baby let it flow don't you know... I know your heart is breaking

  I wanna hear you laugh again... is that a sin

  Or even hear you cry

  Just let me see some emotion

  But I know you miss him so

  We miss him too

  So baby let it flow don't you know... I know your heart is breaking

  But honey you will have to try

  Try to get through this

  You had something very special... yes we know

  But in the end it was time to say goodbye

  Lying there day after day

  Us never knowing what to say

  So baby let it flow don't you know... I know your heart is breaking

  He was long gone from this life

  But never not from you... no not from you.

  He will walk with you each day

  He will try and make it ok

  If he could he'd take your pain away

  But now thats up to you... yes up to you

  So baby let it flow don't you know... I know your heart is breaking

  I know your heart is breaking

  My heart is breaking too... for you

  GRADUATE OF THE GUARDIAN

  Who is the keeper of the guardian angels

  Who keeps they warm and hugs there woes

  Who so teaches them right from wrong

  And how not to break into song

  While caring for their families

  Is there a special class at heavens gates

  Were Peter says, 'hay I have a place,

  just for you mind'

  Who is the keeper of the guardian angels

  That takes care of my babies seven

  Tell them how to behave

  How they must be very brave

  Who teaches them how to walk beside

  And watch over us without a word

  I want to Thank him, tell him from me

  That I care for his wonderess work

  So Well done Angels you have passed your test

  'Graduates of Guardian Angel College'

  AFFAIR'S COME IN PAIRS !!!

  Do you know why

  I would rather die

  Will I even care

  Were you even there

  Can you even see

  How she plays up to me

  Does she really know

  Or is that just another go

  Have I got a hope

  Sometimes it feels like a rope

  Are there just the two

  He looks up to you

  Did he worry for them

  Please please tell me when

  No now is not the time

  And no it's not fine

  The lies just have to stop

  Or my heart will really pop

  I never want to hear

  What do you have to fear

  It all falls in to place

  Yes I know the face

  Confessions of two teenagers

  Over heard at a coffee house !!!

  Does it hurt

  DOES IT HURT

  Miscarriage one to seven

  Appendix removal

  Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy

  DVT

  Plaster cast

  Paralyses Lower body

  Wheelchair

  Dystoina

  Hysterectomy

  Spinal nerve block

  Paralyses Right leg left leg

  Wheelchair

  Bladder Augmentation

  Self cathetering

  Addison’s disease

  Medication Guiney Pig

  Spinal vertebrae shrinkage

  Paralyses from the neck down

  Wheelchair

  Walker

  Crutches

  Fourteen Medications including

  A Morphine Patch

  Only when I laugh

  I SEE THROUGH YOU

  What do I have to do

  to prove it to you

  Or what do I have to say

  Can't you see just what they've done

  What have we become,

  just a race, without a face

  Cause, I see through you

  I see how fake you are

  I see through you

  I Know the game you play

  Cause I see through you

  I see through you

  I see through you

  But not for those in power

  They've made it all turn sour

  Give us back our pride we don't try to hide

  But they take and take and take

  Is it just a big mistake.

  Cause, I see through you

  I see how fake you are

  I see through you

  I know the game you play

  Cause I see through you

  I see through you

  I see through you

  As the banks they squeeze and squeeze

  And we just try to please

  But it don't help our needs

  As they live life, without a care

  No No don't they dare

  Try and justify, (with) they care

  Cause, I see through you

  I see how fake you are

  I see through you

  I know the game you play

  Cause I see through you

  I see through you

  I see through you

  Pensions in the bin

  this is not the way to win

  Or is it just a big bad sin

  Taxes soar so high, levies

  almost reach the sky

  Yay we're dying in our shoes

  and trying hard not to lose

  But I see through you

  I see how fake you are

  I see through you

  I know the game you play

  I see through you

  I see through you

  DO YOU KNOW

  Do you know who I am

  Do you care where I've been

  Do you know what I do

  Do you care what I've done

  Will you share with me your life

  Will you share with me how you live

  Will you share with me what you do

  Will you share with me what you have done

  And will you and I join together to become one

  And from that one become three four or more

  Will we all live together in a house full of love

  Will we share

  Will we care

  Will we dare to

  Last beyond loves last song

  Do you know I think we will

  JACK AND JILL WENT UP THAT HILL

  What was keeping him for the love of god, Jill McSweeny thought to herself now.

  Sure all he had to do was put his bloody boots on and they talk about women being vain. Jack Byrnes just loved checking himself out in the mirror. He was the only fella she knew who kept a comb in his back pocket, even if he was only going out to bring the cows in for milking.

  I mean I’d ask of you, who’s going to be looking at him out here in the sticks miles away from civilization? Our nearest neighbours are over eight miles down the bog road and sure Mrs Kenny’s legs have been giving her trouble now going on three years. Anyhow everyone knows she’s almost as blind as a bat. So whoever Jack is trying to impress I’ve no idea, I’d just wish he’d hurry on. I’m freezing.

  Thank god. Here he comes, not looking any better than he did twenty minutes ago mind.

  ‘Come on girl, stop your day dreaming! That won’t get us anywhere,’ Jack said and gave her a cheeky smile.’

  ‘Well the nerve of you Jack Byrnes.’

  ‘What’s got you hot under the collar all of a sudden? I just needed to fetch something from me bedroom. And tell me Ma we are off. You can’t half get cranky Jill, if you didn’t want to come why didn’t you just say so?’

  ‘You know well Jack that my Ma won’t hear of you going up to bring the cows in on your own, if she could offer some help.�
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  ‘Ah, come on Jill, it’s not so bad.’

  Jill knew that there was no point in being mad with him. Sure what harm, the walk would do her good anyway.

  As they hurried up to the Head, the wind caught up. Jill’s long curly hair was flying all over the place and her young face was flushed from exertion.

  ‘Jack,’ Jill shouted so as to be heard over the roar of the wind.

  ‘Jack, could you slow down a bit, and why are we heading for the Well when the cows are in the field over?’

  ‘Come on girl. Hurry along I have something to tell you, or maybe I should say something to ask you.’

  They arrived at the Well, which is out on Merry Head. You can hear the waves down below crashing against the rock face as Jack sat on the wall of the old Well.

  ‘Okay, out with it Jack what chore am I needed to help with now?’

  Jill rushed in a little breathless from the climb and the wind that has her hair danced around her face as she pushed it away.

  ‘Well, I was thinking.’

  Oh, were you indeed.’

  ‘Will you just shut up for a minute and let me talk? Well Jill I am hoping...’ Jack put his hand inside his jacket and pulled out a small black velvet box.

  ‘...that you will be my girl and wear this ring.’ Jack opened the box and stood holding it out to Jill.

  Had Jack Byrnes really just asked her to be his girl? The most handsome boy in school, who she had loved secretly for many years now. Was it really her he was asking to be his girl or was this some sort of joke? Yes that was it...

  ‘Well, Jack Byrnes if this is some sort of joke I assure you...’

  ‘So will you...’

  ‘Yes,’ she said in almost a whisper because her throat had the biggest lump in it. She was trying so hard not to cry.

  Then Jack wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head.

  ‘Come sit down here and try it on girl,’ now they both sat on the Well wall.

  ‘How did you know what size ring to get?’ Jill asked Jack now as she fitted it on.

  ‘Remember last year when I won the ring in the Barn Brack, and you claimed it should be yours because it fitted you perfectly?

  Well, I took it in to town with me and the jeweller sized it so we could get the perfect size ring for you.’

  ‘But Jack it must have cost a fortune, it’s so very beautiful thank you.’

  Jill leaned over and kissed him ever so slightly on the cheek.

  ‘But don’t think for a minute that this means I’ll be doing your chores every other evening.

  Come on boy or your Da will think the cows are never coming home.’ Jill jumped up reaching to pull Jack by the hand. But Jack stumbled as he got up and slipped backwards falling against the small wall of the Well, but the wall gave way and as Jack lost his balance.

  Jill looked on helplessly as Jack tried to stop himself from falling in. It felt like everything was moving in slow motion as Jack disappeared down into the Well. Jill rushed to the Well, calling Jack’s name all the while, but she couldn’t see a thing. She kept calling for Jack to answer her, hoping someone would come and help her, but there was no one.

  Oh god, what to do! She knew she would have to go and get help but she didn’t want to leave him on his own. She called out to him again and again. There was still no answer. Now she knew the only thing for it was to run as fast as she could to get help.

  Jill didn’t know how long it took her to reach the farmhouse to get help. One of Jack’s older brothers, Sean, met her in the yard. It took him a few minutes to make out what Jill was saying to him. Sean gathered his other two brothers and his Da to head up to the Well.

  Jill’s Ma and her brother Cormack came to see what all the noise and shouting was all about.

  Jill insisted she wanted to go with them. She kicked and screamed at Cormack that she wanted to be there for Jack.

  Jill’s Ma held her very firmly. She made her go inside and get a hot drink. She had just had a terrible shock. Inside Jill howled into her apron, as her mother tried to support her young daughter.

  ‘Come on now girl, get this hot drink into you.’ Jill’s mother had to hold the cup to her lips because her hands were shaking so much. Then Jill’s mother made her lie down on the settee by the fireside and covered her with a blanket.

  ‘Be a good girl now and try to take a wee sleep.’ Jill’s mother looked down at her young daughter now and her heart was breaking for her.

  Jill woke to the sound of the dogs barking. Her throat hurt and her eyes stung. For just a moment she wondered what was wrong and then it came to her again.

  As fresh tears began to form in her eyes again, she thought of the night before. She had heard them coming back, the noise of the tractors and the dogs barking but no voices. She had gone to the back door just as her brother Cormack was coming in. She looked at Cormack and could see he had been crying.

  ‘Well,’ she shouted at Cormack ‘tell me for god sakes, tell me...’

  ‘I’m sorry Jill, he didn’t make it. His head wounds... Well, there was just too much damage. He died almost as soon as he fell...’

  After that she could hardly remember what had happened. She remembered someone carrying her to her bedroom. Then she had hazy dreams about getting married and waiting at the church but no one turned up. The last dream she remembered, she was sitting with Jack out at the apple blossom tree in the meadow. He was telling her that she shouldn’t be sad and not to worry. He would always be somewhere nearby to help her along the way.

  For a while, after Jack’s burial, Jill’s life took a bit of a tumble. Until finally one day she heard his voice in her head telling her it was time to move on. It was what Jack would have wanted.

  And into the wind she whispered, ‘I love you,’ to Jack. ‘Someday we will walk together again’.

  LIFE AND LIVING

  ALL IN A MOMENT OF TIME

  My writes my words my wrongs my rights

  I play for you each coming day

  My soul my heart my love is taken

  I rest I wait I pray today

  My aches my pains my will of song

  I run I hide I died

  We walked we talked we wondered

  I sang I soared I conquered

  We dined we danced we fled

  I cried I sighed I lost but still

  We were we had we did

  I run I hide I died

  All in a moment of time

  MEMORIES

  Memories that remain

  Are the things that can never be the same

  How I wish for them

  But I know I must refrain

  Memories of youth

  Never knowing who to suit

  Summers never idol

  You were always my rival

  Memories of Love

  Conquers the world

  But fades in time

  I was sure you were mine

  Memories of old

  Nothing quite so bold

  You have passed me by

  It was your time to die

  Memories now a loan

  Not talking on the phone

  Email box is empty when

  How I wish that there were plenty

  Memories now fade

  Life’s just like a blade

  Sharp that is now blunt

  I can’t play this stunt

  So just give up the hunt

  MOTHER NATURE

  I went to see her today

  She crashed in around me

  Not caring that once again

  She was full on no hell

  Knew her fury

  While others relished

  Moving to her beat

  I refrained

  Not wanting her to know me

  I will come again another day

  And I will walk beside her

  Feel her body under foot

  And she will know me then

  I know she is a danger

&nbs
p; Waiting for me to slip

  And she knows I am carefully

  watching and she knows

  As I do that Mother Nature

  Cannot always be your friend

  MY DEMON

  It calls to me from far away

  I swear I will not listen

  I look for something to distract me

  All the while chanting I can’t hear you

  I can’t hear you.

  But in the end my will begins to bend

  For what am I, just a poor mortal soul?

  I have no wizardry or magic wand

  To make it disappear

  Will someone please tell me how?

  But you tell me it can only be my will alone

  Now my body begins to shake and sweat,

  The headache pounds and the bile forms

  As the call seems to come nearer and nearer

  Would it be easier to die? I cry.

  Maybe, I think, yes maybe

  But what of the lives

  I leave behind?

  Yes, I have myself believe,

  It would ease their misery.

  Free from the worry

  Of their ongoing nightmare

  that is me

  I think about them each in turn

  Until I come to her:

  The Angle blond with big blue eyes

  That pierces your very soul

  Those eyes have begged me many times

  To return to the person I once was,

  I pull back a little and think.

  For I know what I must do,

  Ignore the call and if I die trying

  I will have at least died a better person,

  I will put hope back into those eyes.

  I will beat this demon,

  I will return my soul

  To what it was once before,

  Once I took the devils hand

  Now I let this Guardian Angel take mine.

  NINE MINUS SEVEN

  I give her to you now my womb replies to me

  I set her free for she is for this world

  How joyess a moment but take it for granted

  As she grows we ask for more so certain

  are we and why not

  And then once again our voice is heard

  and again for granted we are so sure.

  But the womb replies to soon

  and you are gone

  What I ask you of you have we done wrong

  But you tell us nothing and we ask again